Exactly one year and one day from the death of my beloved husband, I had the first of three surgeries to remove cancer from my body. More specifically, a double […]
cancer / Child Loss / faith / Grief / Widowhood
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2 years—cancer free!
When I found out I had cancer only nine months after my husband died, I didn’t think I even wanted to survive it. I was numb. I was exhausted. I […]
faith / Grief / seasons / Widowhood
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Death Gives Way to Life
Autumn can be a mixed bag for the griever. It’s as if fall now has a death-shadow cast over it, with every falling leaf a reminder that life must end […]
Grief / poetry / Widowhood
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Taking Pictures of Pictures
Taking pictures of pictures, so precious and few,Snapshots of moments we can never re-do;So many, I’d freeze-frame if I had the chance,Saving each second that I spent with you. And […]
faith / Grief / Parenting / Widowhood
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Do You Look like Your Father?
Slowly but surely, we begin to resemble those closest to us. I see it in my children the most. (Even the adopted ones.) Not only do they look like their […]
faith / Grief / Widowhood
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Manna & Mercy Every Morning
Three years ago, today, I stood in a hospital corridor, praying over this man. His nurse had called and said he was crashing and would likely be gone before I […]
cancer / child loss / faith / Grief / Widowhood
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Visiting Grief
Today was just one of those days. I love rollercoasters, but not the emotional kind. I get frustrated with myself when I have days like this. I think I’m doing […]
child loss / faith / Grief / Widowhood
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Walk Worthy, Because He is Worthy
Facing 2022 was just hard. My first year without him in it. A milestone that felt more like a millstone — tied about my neck and dragging me under, as […]
faith / Grief / Widowhood
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Not Strong, And That’s Okay
Can we just be real?I’m not as strong as some people think I am.There. I said it. I could lie to you and say that I wasn’t sobbing in my […]
child loss / faith / Grief / Trauma / Widowhood
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When Grief Collides with Faith
Profound grief has a way of bringing us face to face with what we actually believe about God. Often, we are surprised by our doubt. We wrestle with the juxtaposition […]
faith / Grief / Widowhood
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Grief, Like a Hurricane
“Have you ever seen the aftermath of a hurricane?” This was the widower’s response when I asked him if the second year is any easier than the first. I didn’t […]