You Should’ve Been Here

This is a poem I wrote to Jeremy over the past two weeks. I wanted to share it here, in hopes that it makes you feel:
1) seen
2) not alone in your feelings
3) encouraged in the Lord.

As we face the hardest day of the year (in my estimation)—the end of one and the beginning of another, without them in it—my prayer for you is that you know beyond a doubt that you are loved.

Not just by me and others here, but by the One who gave Himself, for you to be forever with Him, together with those we love.

🩷Audra

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You Should’ve Been Here.

Another year comes to an end,
As I still try to comprehend
This story, without my best friend;
You should’ve been here.

Christmastime is past, once more,
And, while it’s gifts I can’t ignore,
It’s just not what it was before.
You should’ve been here.

The tree was trimmed and stockings, hung,
Candles lit and carols sung,
Did all the things we’ve always done.
You should’ve been here.

The kids are growing up, it’s true,
But Christmas cards, I couldn’t do,
With family pictures, minus you.
You should’ve been here.

The beds were filled with kids back home,
From baby girl to fully grown,
Yet, still, I had to wake alone.
You should’ve been here.

Luke 2 was read, like every year,
Yet, without the voice we all held dear,
It sounded foreign to my ear.
You should’ve been here.

My mind could hardly take it in;
The child, once lost, came home again!
For this, we’ve prayed since 2010.
You should’ve been here.

More answered prayers this year will bring:
Another son—a joyful thing!
I gave our blessing, and my ring.
You should’ve been here.

More precious moments soothed my soul,
Where grief and trauma took their toll—
A baby girl to fill the hole.
You should’ve been here.

My heart is full, yet there’s an ache
For journeys you’ll no longer take,
And memories we’ve yet to make.
You should’ve been here.

But as I sat and wrote these lines,
The Holy Spirit brought to mind
Another place, another time:
“You should’ve been here.”

Two thousand years ago, or more,
A grieving girl said to the Lord,
“You could’ve helped, of this I’m sure.
You should’ve been here.”

Full of compassion, He replied,
“It looks that way to human eyes,
But, so the grace of God may shine,
I couldn’t have been here.”

“I am the resurrection, so,
From this death, new life will grow.
Do you believe this, even though
I couldn’t have been here?”

Then in an act miraculous,
Jesus called forth Lazarus,
So all would know He’s God-with-us;
He’s always been here!

In that moment I knew, full well,
The lesson Christmas had to tell:
God with us—Emmanuel.
He’s always been here.

And so, although I miss you still,
I know my Father’s sovereign will
Shall all my needs and hopes fulfill.
He’ll always be here.

Yes, another year has come and gone,
With battles lost and battles won—
A whole new chapter’s just begun.
‘Til the last page turns and my story’s done,
He’ll always be here.

ALS 2025