This is resilience.
I remember a huge holly tree that took up residence next to our house when I was young. She was actually quite beautiful, but when she started destroying the screens in our second story windows, my dad took a power saw to her. He chopped her down, and that was the end of that.
Or was it?
Did you know that holly trees are resilient little buggers? Sure enough, she grew back again and again.
Recently, I saw this little tree sprouting up from a tree stump at the end of our road, and I remembered our old persistent Holly. Her robust root system was able to store up energy and carbohydrates to facilitate regrowth, even after everything she used to be was destroyed. Arborists call this natural survival process “stump sprouting.” I call it post-traumatic growth.
Resilience certainly doesn’t mean that you just bounce back after trauma. and it doesn’t mean the trauma doesn’t leave its mark. It means we teach our trauma to serve us, rather than the other way around. This little tree and I are both living proof that post-traumatic growth is possible.
Here’s what I’ve learned.
Roots make all the difference.
As a blood-bought, regenerate follower of Jesus Christ, I am grafted in. I am connected to the Vine that is connected to the Roots. That means that I—by proxy—possess the same power that resurrected Jesus from the grave! Resilience is possible, not because of my faith, but only because of the One in Whom I’ve put my faith.
Acceptance is vital.
Resilience requires acknowledging that things don’t always work out the way we plan and surrendering that reality to the Lord. We don’t have to be happy about everything that happens to us, but we do need to trust those things to the one who works all things together for good.
We must believe.
We can do even this through Christ, Who gives us strength. If we don’t think resilience is possible, then we inadvertently disconnect ourselves from our source of power. This isn’t name-it, claim-it prosperity, this is active faith in the regenerative power of the Holy Spirit!
It’s going to be hard work.
Make no mistake, this will be a difficult journey. Although our roots are our source of strength, growth is not a passive process. We have to dig in and do things that are anything but easy. Processing grief isn’t easy. Thought replacement isn’t easy. Change isn’t easy. But post-traumatic growth and the resulting strength are worth it.
You have to want to heal.
No, we will never “move on.” However, if we allow the things that threaten to destroy us develop us, rather than define us, we give ourselves permission to live the abundant life Christ offers us. Like me, you might need help to come to this place. Get it. This is the kind of “self-care” that lasts.
Friend, we can more than survive this shadowy Valley; we can thrive in it. Not because our grief doesn’t matter, but because we allowed the Master to use it to shape us into holier and more surrendered versions of ourselves.
What is resilience? My grief for His glory.
🩷Audra
