Today was Valentine’s Day.
I knew it was going to be a hard “first,” so I’ve been keeping myself busy so I didn’t have to think too much about a Valentine’s Day without my husband. 0ur first date was on this day, 26 years ago. I’ve been thinking a lot about that night. The memories make me smile. We attended a Valentine’s Banquet at our Bible college. As is typical for February in northern Wisconsin, the ground that night was snowy and icy. Jeremy gallantly offered his arm to let me steady myself as I made my way across the icy sidewalk in formal and high heels. All I can say is, I’m glad I wasn’t holding on very tightly, because a few seconds later, he was down! Poor guy. He tried so hard! But that awkward start ended up being the beginning of a beautiful love story. For the last 25 years, February 14th has always been a pretty special day to us, and he always went above and beyond to make all four of his girls feel especially loved on that day. It’s been a hard few days for all of us.
This weekend we had our church Valentine’s Banquet. I’m in charge of these things, so I could easily have cancelled. This was something Jeremy and I always did together, so everyone would have understood. But avoidance is rarely helpful. Sometimes you just have to make yourself do the hard thing, even if it hurts. I can’t say I haven’t cried a lot this past week or so. I won’t tell you how many times I visited his grave this week. I have dragged my girls to church with me several times, just so I didn’t have to do this alone. I try to do all the things I normally do, plus all the things he normally did, all while missing him profoundly. Sometimes, life is just stupid hard!
But you know what? I’m glad I did the hard thing. I’m glad to have another “first” behind me. I’m glad my students are learning that our service to God isn’t conditional on our circumstances. I’m glad I have the support of a loving church family. I’m glad God is still allowing me to serve Him.
Above all else, I’m glad I have a Father in Heaven Who is love, personified. He is husband to the widow and father to the orphan. He is the perfect Valentine because He loves me with an everlasting, unconditional, self-sacrificial, enduring love.
He loves you the same.
There can be no greater love.
We could ask for no better Valentine.
He awaits you with open arms; arms that were stretched out on a cross for you.
Tony Campolo was right about this: “When people recognize God as the ultimate Significant Other, they define their worth in terms of their relationship with Him.”
As Christians, we are Christ’s bride.
With Jesus, we can do hard things. ❤️
(Written Valentine’s Day, 2022, just 4 months after Jeremy’s graduation to Heaven)
