A couple of years ago, we saw a cute, animated movie about the happenings inside a 12-yr-old girl’s mind. Each quirky character in “Inside Out” represents an emotion the preteen is feeling during a major life change. “Joy” spends most of the movie working hard to keep it all together, but everyone else seems to be working against her. Particularly, “Sadness.” She doesn’t intend to cause so much trouble, but she just can’t help herself. Everything is a disaster, until Joy and Sadness learn to work together and appreciate each other’s value. Only as they learn to live in harmony are they able to truly benefit their human.
Joy and sadness are not mutually exclusive.
It is possible—in fact, healthy—to experience both emotions simultaneously. So many grievers feel needlessly guilty for finding bits of joy in this unwanted new life, and some even live in fear of ever experiencing happiness again. We think we are honoring their memory, but we fail to understand that living life to the full was God’s idea. We dishonor our loved one—and Jesus—when we quench the Spirit in this way.
Joy exists because of the Holy Spirit in me, not because of the circumstances I am in.
Likewise, many of us feel guilty for grieving. “I have so much for which to be thankful,” we tell ourselves. “I shouldn’t still be crying.” So we suppress the tears and put on a happy face. God gave us our emotions for a reason, and suppressing them is toxic.
In the movie, chaos ensues when joy and sadness are both missing, and Anger, Fear and Disgust are left alone to rule. Our emotions are a gift! The key is to use those emotions as thermometers and not thermostats— indicators, not rulers.
Jesus faced the greatest pain imaginable when He faced the cross for us. Not the pain of the crucifixion, but the pain of bearing the shame of all of our sin, resulting in the most excruciating pain of all—separation from His Father.
And yet…
🤍 Jesus, for the joy that was set before Him, endured the cross.
🤍 It pleased God to crush His son for our redemption.
Talk about inside-out! Both, seeing joy in the midst of unimaginable pain.
We should not feel guilty for experiencing moments of happiness in the midst of our sorrow. Enjoy them. They are a precious gift from a loving Father Who knows exactly what you need, exactly when you need it.
We also should not suppress our sorrow. When the waves hit; ride them out. You’re not bipolar; you’re grieving. Grief is messy. It’s okay to not be okay. Those tears are also a gift from God and a natural pain reliever.
So, grieve. Feel the hurt. Shed the tears. But also, laugh. Find pleasure in life again. Live life to the full. Enjoy your silver linings. Weep over the life and love you’ve lost, but also, fall more deeply in love with the lover of your soul. Long for Heaven, but also, cherish each moment, redeeming the time you have left.
Pain and joy can coexist in bittersweet harmony…. and when they do, that blend will make your life song that much more beautiful.
May 17, 2022