Today would have been our 25th anniversary. My first without him. I’ve been dreading this day. I was afraid I would spend the whole day weeping over what I’ve lost; what will never be. But here I am, sitting on his grave, listening to worship music and smiling. It’s not that I’m not sad. I’m missing him fiercely. But my heart is overwhelmed with thankfulness when I think of the life we shared. Not everyone gets to experience twenty-five years of unconditional love.
Of course, our life wasn’t all a bed of roses. It was more like a messy, beautiful minefield. But we navigated it together. The two of us and God. For almost twenty-five years.
Almost twenty-five years of love and laughter,
adventure and adversity,
trials and tears,
sickness and sorrow,
failure and faithfulness,
growth and grace,
forgiveness and faith,
life and loss.
Almost twenty-five years of being led ever closer to Jesus by a man who loved us both with every fiber of his being.
One of Jeremy’s favorite songwriters was Andrew Peterson. When this song first came out, Jeremy claimed it as ours, so I drew this picture for him for our 21st Anniversary.
__________________________
Dancing in the Minefields
“I do” are the two most famous last words
The beginning of the end
But to lose your life for another, I’ve heard
Is a good place to begin
‘Cause the only way to find your life
Is to lay your own life down
And I believe it’s an easy price
For the life that we have found
And we’re dancing in the minefields
We’re sailing in the storms
This is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that’s what the promise is for
That’s what the promise is for
So when I lose my way, find me
When I loose love’s chains, bind me
At the end of all my faith, till the end of all my days
When I forget my name, remind me
‘Cause we bear the light of the Son of Man
So there’s nothing left to fear
So I’ll walk with you in the shadowlands
Till the shadows disappear
‘Cause He promised not to leave us
And His promises are true
So in the face of all this chaos
Baby, I can dance with you
So let’s go dancing in the minefields
Let’s go sailing in the storms
Oh, let’s go dancing in the minefields
And kicking down the doors
Oh, let’s go dancing in the minefields
And sailing in the storms
Oh, this is harder than we dreamed
But I believe that’s what the promise is for
That’s what the promise is for
_____________________________
Today, I choose to be thankful for 25 years of the most beautiful dance I could have ever dreamed.
Happy Anniversary, baby. Thank you for dancing in the Minefields with me for almost twenty-five years.